Tuesday, August 3, 2010

Street Walker

Just about every day I hit the streets. Okay, not the streets so much as the neighborhood roads. I like to take a nice long walk, listen to some music and lately, die of heat stroke. It is hot outside! So, my walks have become less frequent and much shorter. Despite this, I find myself thinking of weird things on my walks.
For example, Canadians are awesome.

That is not up for debate in case anyone was wondering. The real question here is, why are Canadians so awesome? Well, in my mind it is because they have no pressure. I mean, they get all of the benefits of being American without the crappy part of actually being American. Now I know, I am blessed to be a citizen of this country with all of it's benefits and "Stars-and-Stripes-Forever" or whatever. Let's be honest, Canadians are the ones who are lucky.

Irony is a jerk. I'm not even kidding. Whose side is it on? Just when you think you've got irony figured out, it does something to surprise you. Which I guess should be expected, really.

I like to think of myself as a pretty passive person. Scratch that, I like to think of myself as a pretty passive aggressive person. My Nona and Papa (Grandma and Grandpa) are currently living in our house. Now, I love them. I really do. However, they are absolutely insane and not the cool kind of insane. They are the really, really annoying kind of crazy. They make weird food for dinner and make a huge production number out of it, they have taken over our living room and kitchen, and, worst of all, they have turned our house which used to be spotless into a mess. How do I combat this insanity? I sing a song. Actually, I sing quite a few different songs in a loud and obnoxious manner. I do this while I am in the shower, in my room, and anywhere else. I even do it in the wee small hours of the morning (and to take us back to irony, I usually sing "In the Wee Small Hours of the Morning"). One time, I sang a song called "Sound of Your Voice" as loudly as I could at five o' clock in the morning. The chorus includes the words, "I'll wake up to the sound of your voice," which made it very funny to me. I have realized that the only way I can survive is to live with the philosophy if fighting hair singeing with hair singeing. In other words, to fight passive aggression with passive aggression. I encourage all of you to do the same.



  1. I love your impromptu shower concerts, especially the late night ones. Keep up the good work and we will eventually take back our house, or die trying!

  2. Ah, passive agression. The story of my life.

  3. That's basically how I fight everything: with passive aggression.